New year is coming up a head !

Hi..I'm take393,..how was your Christmas?
Did you enjoy it?
I didn't do anything special at all. But I've found one thing..that is to say, Christmas let people feel more relax, also it makes people become more tender to others.
Yon know what I mean?
Even someone pushes me around to do the task or something, I can be more patient, I can let someone says whatever he or she wants to. Only the reason is...it's Christmas, so I don't want to take it out on others.

Alright let's talk about novel...Last time I mentioned how I became closer to those two guys..I guess I have to refer to them in more details.
One guy called 'Makoto' was born in Gunma (a northern part of Kanto Region). He was a year older than I.He grew up in Gunma until he became 8 years old. At that time his parents have devorced and his dad has gone away, so his mother had to raise her children.
Makoto used to have one sister who was 3 years younger than he, but he had lost her due to the sickness when he was 5 years old.
His mother had to work around the clock to raise Makoto. While she was working she has developed cerebral hemorrhage and had to be hopitalized. After 2 months have passed she suddenly passed away...though Makoto was still at his age of 8 years old.When he heard the news that his mother died like a dog, he was really in desperate.
So Makoto had to rely himself on his relative who were his aunt and her husband after all, however it didn't go well.
As they were so nasty and often tried to push him around to help their housework and stuff as he grows up. Especially, his uncle in law was so alcoholic that he often beat up against Makoto when he was in a middle school.

One day after graduating middle school, Makoto decided to get away from them, and he wandered around from place to place, and finally he came up to Tokyo all the way from Gunma and looked for a job.
Still,Makoto was 15 then, and wasn't easy to get a decent job, either since he didn't have any guarantor nor had he any identification. All what Makoto did is,to fake up his walking path, for instance...by cheating some of his passing careers, prentending to be order as if he were 18, using a fake name and so on. He hid himself and deceived others on and on, and he's got a job at the end.
But actually it was not the one what Makoto really expected. To put it more specific, he forced to work as a 'lady-boy'at a certain gay bar, whereas it was not his cup of tea.
As Makoto was pretty handsome guy, he made many guests being attracted, so that he always ranked the first of the boy's list.

Well...I'm afraid it's running out of time,so we stop there.Next time I'll try to refer to Makoto thoroughly. Probably, that would be next year, I'm really sorry about that.
See you next year, and I wish all you guys to have a nice new year !

take393

It's Christmas !

Hi...I'm take393, long time no see!
To tell you the truth, as I was pretty hectic these days, and my dad god rest his soul all of a sudden last month, that's why I couldn't get around to it..so it took me quite a long time to get into this essay. Sorry for making excuses.
As you know...today is the Christmas eve...but unfortunately, I have no plan yet,and I haven't come up with the idea how to spend it either.Since I'm not a Christian, nor am I young enough to think of how to make it up for the wasting times, you know.
I haven't celebrate my own Christmas for ages, since I had split it up long time before.
Today,I'd like to mention how I addicted to drugs and stuff.After I've got acqainted with two guys which I mentioned before, I was just playing around and I ended up being kicked out the university, as it seemed so hard to get a degree within 4 years.Rather I was really wanting to jump into the another pond instead of graduating university.At that time, I was hoping to be richer and didn't want to drag out the situation that I was still down and out.
I really wanted to make my own way so as to seize some chance to make money. I would like to be a certain celebrity, like a millionaire or something, you know. And I was always wondering why most people hold onto such kind of fucking degrees and stuff, whereas some others try to take a chance to seize their dreams. Besides it seemed more fun to take alternative way to make your life fruitful, as far as I was concerned.
2 guys which I met seemed not to be mediocre, so that I was intrigued so much. They seemed to be so cool, like James Dean,Elvis Plesley, or something like big star...that I can't possibly imitate to be.
And what's more, they've got a expesive vehicle, a motorbike as well as a luxurious accommodation, like a big condominium incruding a bar counter that seems definitely impossible for me to come by...

As long as I tag along with those guys, I was no longer strapped for cash either.
But later I found that it was all illusion. They've only played tricks on me dozens of time, and I wasn't able to get away from them.

Sorry, it's time...bye for now, see you !

take393

Let's get back to my novel

Hi...I'm take393,last time I just went off on a tangent and tried to mention what's going around me.
It sounds so tragic for some readers though,while I'm trying to write something of my own,I'm sure that I'm always got to be neutral and I'm always trying to describe things objectively how I feel as well,no matter how things goes,even if it's a good or bad.
You know what I mean?

Today...let's get into my novel in more detail.
After I lost my ex girl friend,I was at a loss and I was just wondering around from place to place.And later after that,I bumped into some guys at a bar.
At that time,I was drinking too much in order to take my minds off her tragic death.
Then I came to realize that every things around me faded away,and that it made me faint and I gradually became confused,and sometime later I fell off to sleep.

Hours passed,it was already dawn out there when I came to know someone was prodding me to wake up....
Two guys were standing right in front of me,and asked me to come along.
I tnrned down their offer at first, but finally I gave in and followed them.
Of course I had no idea how would it be so far...and I wasn't sure what I might gonna do either after I lost her.Only I could do so far was to just tag along wherever they need to go,cause that was the only way I could get away from my tragedy.

The days passed by,we got acqainted with each other closely,then I started to count on them, began to let it all hang out to those guys what was going so far,and occasionally,they showed me some sympathy as well.
I was premature in trusting them so easily,later I came to realize it was all my fault for believing them,but it was too late...

Alright,you guys...let's call it a day, see you next time!

take393

I'll go off on a tangent

Hi..I'm take393,welcome back again,my fellows!
Well,I'm in a bad fix at the moment...sorry for beating around the bush, but I've got to go off on a tangent for a while.

That is to say, my father has been hospitalized for a few months because of developing a cancer in the vicinity of his liver,you know.
I've been writing certain essays regarding my first novel so far which I drafted in 1993.
But while I'm writing my essays,things were getting so drastically,and I came to a conclusion that I must mention what was going around me.
It was on the 28th of July when my father hospitalized,at that time he was not so bad,though he had some problem with his liver.
Then he started to check up thoroughly,and later he found that he has developed a cancer.
So the doctor recommended us to take a surgery before it spread out.we agreed to have him operated,however it didn't go well.
Meanwhile,he seemed to be getting better gradually,but he began to be feverish all of a sudden from the late of Oct.
I had no idea what was going around,and later we found that he was in critical condition,and the doctor told us that they tried to leave no stone unturned,
however everything went wrong!

'What's the hell you were doing,you are bastard!?'
My mother started to take it out on doctors and she turned to be at a loss right after that.
'Sorry,maam...we know how you feel,but we tried to do our best but he didn't seem to be going well. The only thing we can do for you and your husband is to try to keep his life extended by using a respirator...I guess it should be a last resort we can do...'
So we ended up making a decision that we allow doctors to use a respirator for my father in order to avoid his sudden passing.

As a result,he managed to avoid passing but he is still at stake right now.
Now that I make sure he might not be getting well,nor might he be up and around...so far as I'm concerned.

Sorry that I went off on a tangent,cause I feel reluctant to metion about my novel more in detail today.

Hope to see you soon,viewers !

take393

what's more about my novel,again

Hi,I'm take393,today I'd like to mention about my novel,once more.
After we both had broken up,I was just wondering around seeking some lovers, meanwhile my ex-girl friend got married spending extravagant days.
we sometimes kept in touch with each other,knowing what's going around after we've been left apart,but later I found that it was all in vain.
I ve noticed that she would never come back,and my love seemed so far...
so I just quit chasing her for good and tried to find another one.
However,it didn't go well...and a year passed by,I turned to 19...
while I was sophomore in college, a letter came in to my apatment when I got back home,and found my ex-girls'sudden passing due to the car accident.The letter was from her mother,saying she had got involved in the car clash..while she was driving express way with her husband.I was so shocked to hear the incident that I coudn't help but burst into tears.
This incident made me go insane after that,I counldn't control myself either.
I was so hopeless to live without her,just hanging around,started to use some drags,and started to hop around from bar to bar seeing some bad friends to get acquainted with in order to get some drags...

Well,of course it wasn't myself,it's just a fucking story,you know. Alright fulks,let't get into take further steps next week,take care!

take393